In this post, I want to talk about how journaling has been helpful for me in my healing and self-improvement journey.

I first started journaling in 2020 during one of my most challenging times of my life. I was experiencing a really intense depression and I felt so overwhelmed with thoughts and feelings all the time.. It was too much. This depression led me to seek therapy which made me realize how much I had been holding on inside. The simple act of talking to someone in a safe space, was literally the beginning of my journey, because it made me realize how much I was avoiding and repressing that needed to come out to be processed.

In therapy I explored many things with my therapist, but journaling was a space for me to be with me.

I never got into journaling before because there was a part of me who was embarrassed of putting my feelings down on a piece of paper (it felt cringe!) and also a part of me who was afraid of someone finding my journal and reading my thoughts/feelings. I think I had a journal when I was younger, but I don’t think I actually used it for journaling.. I think I used it to write down notes, or quotes, and things like that, but never anything like “dear diary…” I never learned the importance of journaling as tool.

To get over my feelings of resistance towards journaling, and since my therapist recommended journaling, I first began by typing things on a word document and then deleting it; or typing things in my notes app (and I would lock the note to bypass the fear of my notes being read by anyone). I also simply started by typing/writing things down in bullet point form (to bypass the cringiness of going deeper into my feelings). This was helpful for me because it allowed me to at least put everything out instead of holding it inside as I had done for many years.

Something else I would do sometimes, is I would text myself as if I was telling a friend (a safe person) what was going on and how I was feeling (which again, allowed me to put things out of my head); and then I would go back and re-read as if I was reading a text from my friend, and then I would text myself back again with what I would tell a friend if they were in that situation. I did this also for the bullet point technique. I would put everything down first as it wanted/needed to come out, raw feelings.. and then I would go back and re-read as if I was outside of the situation.

The outcome: release emotions and reassess the situation with a different perspective.

Eventually, the feelings of cringe and fear of someone reading my notes went away. I think those feelings got replaced by feelings of connection and deep release. I later realized that one of the biggest benefits (for me) of sitting down and spending as much time as needed to write anything and everything that was in my head/heart, is that I allow myself to actually FEEL the feelings instead of thinking about them.

If you are confused about this, don’t worry, I was too. People would tell me to feel my feelings all the time, and I thought I was feeling them! but turns out I was just rationalizing them… But when I journal, I am actually connecting with the feeling of whatever it is that I am writing about.. This is especially helpful if you have a hard time connecting with your feelings.

Journaling has also been helpful for me to see how far I have come in my journey. To see what kind of things I was struggling with that are no longer present in my life or to be reminded of accomplishments that sometimes I tend to downgrade..

And to be completely honest, I sometimes still forget (or avoid) journaling. I find excuses not to do it, or I get lazy.. and boy do I suffer the consequences of not doing this… I say “suffer” because the feelings of disconnect, confusion, or overwhelm return, which then leads to more dysregulation. But the other side of that coin is that it gets easier each time to return to the habit of journaling, and with that the feelings of clarity return.

I highly encourage getting into a habit of journaling. Or like I said, write things down even if it’s in your notes app, or email yourself, text yourself, write things down and then throw away, or burn (safely burn).. whatever it is that your mind allows you to do, as long as you are getting your thoughts/feelings out of your system!

You can do it! I believe in you 🙂

If you need inspiration these two simple prompts can help you explore both negative and positive feelings:

✨ What has been feeling heavy in your heart lately? Why does it feel heavy? What else can you describe about these feelings or this situation?

✨ What is something that happened recently that made you feel grateful? Why did you feel grateful? What else can you describe about these feelings or this situation?

Expanding on the “why” and any additional feelings can help you stay connected with your emotions as you journal, plus it can help you understand things at a deeper level.